Valentine’s Day is upon us, brimming with heart-shaped candy, Hallmark cards of admiration, and lavish gift exchanges among starry-eyed couples. This proclamation of affection originated with devoted church minister-turned-saint Monsignor Valentine in 270 AD. Evidently, Valentine met the unfortunate fate of being prosecuted for performing well-intentioned marriages between soldiers and their brides. It was wartime, after all, and the government law was that eager grooms ought to have been ogling not their waiting ladies but serious state affairs instead. Historians add that the priest himself fell by the arrow of Cupid during imprisonment, having signed an emotional pre-execution letter in mid-February to his lover, which, predictably, signed off with… from your Valentine.
The 14th day of February is forever highlighted in our diary, presumably in honor of St. Valentine and all the blokes who have fallen head-over-heels in love. But what does the celebrated day look like for the un-romanced? For single persons calling themselves “consciously uncoupled”?
Not everyone is in a dreamy relationship. Given the demands of work and life today, intimate relationships are hard to come by. Online dating has opened new doors for meeting that special person, but online apps have also been criticized for creating feelings of insecurity and worry towards strangers over the internet. Not to mention that divorce rates today are astronomical, making it taxing for separated folks to manage childcare, deal with financial burdens, and overcome the emotional turmoil that comes with having suffered a failed relationship.
So, how do you fill a potential void? How would you prevent yourself from being socially isolated?
In my new book, Alone Time, I suggest that there are times when adults and children alike profit from willingly separating from the social group and practicing some solitude—to explore inner strengths, set goals, and eliminate mind chatter. But in that self-help guide, I make it perfectly clear that aloneness should not be too frequent or take up the majority of the day. No one should feel lonely or excluded from their people. Humans are social animals, and we rely on others for aid, growth, and companionship....More
Sybil Geldart Ph.D. – 05 February, 2024